~Why Us~

A year ago I spent most of the month of August crying because I was sad. I cried for what I lost. I cried for what I didn't have. I forgot to look at all the wonderful blessings I had right in front of me. I prayed for more. I prayed for the baby that was so quickly taken from me. Before I even had a chance to carry him or her to term. Before I got to hold him or her. I often times dream it was a girl with curly red hair. Other times I just wonder if it was a boy or girl.

I remember asking God "why us". The first few times I went to church were hard for me. I had to hold the tears in because of course you don't want to start bawling in front of 200 other church members you hardly know.

Now sitting here a bit over a year later I can't believe how different I feel. I feel like God picked me to carry his angel. He needed me to do a task and I did it. I will never forget what happened. I have learned to live with it and be at peace with what happen. Lighting a single candle at church can bring more peace than I ever imagined.

We were on the fence about foster care around the time last summer when I got pregnant. We wanted to do it but worried about how hard it would be to say good bye to some of the children who would live with us. But after our loss we decided it was the right thing to do. We would consider adoption if a child needed a forever home.

We never imagined getting a call right before the New Year about taking in an infant. Not just any infant, a newborn. We waited it out a few days before baby was born. We met baby and cuddled her at the hospital. We got the call to pick her up from the hospital when she was just 5 days old.

We love this baby girl. We call her ours. We've cried in fear that she would have to leave us someday. We sing to her. We read to her. We hold her in the night when she is crying, We take her to the doctor. We do everything just as if she is ours. We've even asked God "Why us".

Really? Why us? How did we manage to get chosen to be her foster parents?  How did we get so lucky?

As baby girl is crawling around the house, getting into everything she can reach we are so thankful it was us who got the call. We could not imagine her not being here. Every smile, every cry, every time she wakes in the night. We are here for her. I can not even put into words how much we love her.

Sometimes we don't always get the answers we are looking for when we ask "Why us". We just go on believing that this is God's plan.

We are forever grateful of God's plan!

~It Sucks~

Today my husband got part of a weird thing on his face removed. Specialist is 95% sure it is skin cancer. Won't know for about 7-10 days. If it is the rest will have to be removed. He had a weird spot that looked like a scab. I kept telling him it was weird it wasn't healing. Finally he went for a regular physical and they sent him to a specialist today. I guess if you have to have cancer, skin cancer is the better one. Weird to even say that, nobody wants cancer. Cancer in g...eneral just sucks. I know you can get all types of cancer at any age but it sure makes you think about things. I always think your chances are higher as you get older. He is 9 years older than me. Those stupid things go threw your mind like who's going to mow the lawn and put the garbage out. Then you think how selfish to worry about those things. We have children who are still small.... praying this is not the start to many other health issues.

~updates~

Looks like its been a while since I last posted. We've been keeping busy here! There is always a to do list about a mile long. It always includes cleaning and laundry. We can't seem to get away from those two things.

We're still caring for the sweet foster care baby who came to our home in January! To think its been just a couple days shy of 5 months that she has been with us. We are truly blessed. Maddison just asked me yesterday "Why did they pick us when we already had so many kids"? Its hard to say but I wouldn't have it any other way. She is fitting in with our family so nicely. Right now things are moving slowly but we expect the outcome to be that she will need a permanent placement other than with her birth mom. Of course we have already agreed we'd gladly keep her.

 

In other news Maddison celebrated her birthday on March 17.

Her cake turned out just perfect!

It was yummy too.

 

Abby graduated the 5th grade.

Wow, next year she goes to the middle school.

~Birthdays~

Time to play catch up! You know life gets busy around here with 6 kids, one dog and 2 birds in the house. Oh plus a daycare full of kids during the day. I have had a full group of kids for a few weeks now. I was just asked to take on 2 more kids part-time. They will only be here during daycare hours and the county is allowing me to have the extra kids. I have watched them before and they are very well behaved kids. Keeps me busy though.

Since we have a March birthday coming up I figured I better post about the January and February ones we already had.

Ms. Abby turned 11 years old in January.

It was her golden birthday so we went for a gold and purple theme.

Jade turned 13 in February.

We now have a teenager in the house.

 

Funny how just over night they can learn everything there is to know!

~sleep~

We don't always get a lot of sleep around here. I am excited to report though that sweet little baby we are caring for slept 5.5 hours straight last night! She woke up and took a bottle and went right back to sleep for another 4 hours! We are making progress! She will be 2 months old on Saturday. Hard to believe. She is growing like a weed! I tried to put a sleeper on her last night that was size 3 months and it did not fit anymore. So maybe she will be really tall? We have no idea really what to expect. Kind of weird and kind of exciting all rolled into one.

~First Foster Child~

We've had our first little foster care child since January 12. Things have been going pretty good besides missing a little bit of sleep at night! She is fitting in very nicely and the kids love her.

~A long wait~

I was going about the normal routine one week ago today, Tuesday, December 30. I was getting the daycare kids ready for lunch and the phone rang. Of course I answered it. It was a Social Worker. She was asking me if we would be willing to take in a very young child. A newborn! I was a bit shocked so didn't really ask any questions. I said yes. She told me she was going to be out of the office for a few days with the New Years holiday coming up. She informed me that when baby arrives we would get a phone call from a Social Worker or Supervisor on call.

Of course I got excited after hanging up the phone. Later that night I made a trip to Walmart to get a few things that we would need. I purchased a couple bottles, diapers, sleepers, onesies, and a carseat.

Since then we have been waiting. We have been trying to pass the time. We have been trying not to get too overly excited. We have baked cookies. We have cleaned the house, twice. We've worked on fleece tie blankets. We started watching dumb shows on Netflix. We've waited long enough.

I called yesterday around 9am and left a message with the Social Worker. I simply asked if I should still be waiting or if plans have changed. I haven't received a call back yet. I sure hope to hear something today. I like to have a plan and right now I feel like there is no plan.